Major Changes

I’ve been known to be impulsive from time to time and today is no exception. I quit my job today. What is wrong with me? Given today’s economy, how could I just walk away from stable income? I’m still trying to figure that out. Luckily I picked up a part-time job a few months ago, so that should help until I find another full-time job but I’m ridiculous. I know what my problem is. The problem is that I only love writing, and by writing, I don’t mean technical writing like what I was doing, but rather, writing like this and creative writing. I enjoy writing about myself and about things that are happening around me and I absolutely could not live without writing stories and poetry. I need to figure out a way to make writing my career because its my passion and I know that no job I find is going to make me happy unless it involves the type of writing I enjoy doing. Yes, I’ve said that before but this time I mean it. I thought just finding a writing job would do the trick, but my former job taught me otherwise. What’s the point in writing if I hate what I’m writing? I don’t have to love everything I write, and truthfully I have yet to love anything that I’ve written, but I do need to like what I’ve written. I don’t want to write something and then never want to read it again like I did with the things I wrote for my job.

Now I have to figure out how to make this new turn in the road work for me and not against me. The good news is that I’ll have more free time than usual, but I still won’t be completely free because I have to find another job and I’ll probably increase the hours of my part-time job. Man it sucks not having a real job! Oh wait, that’s my fault. What did I do this time?

A quick poem I wrote today:

Ungrateful

Jobless and sad
But not homeless and broken
Weak like watered down tea
Begging for the bag to steep a little longer
Too little flavor becomes too much
Too bitter to taste
I spit out what once was mine.

Emotional status: Riding an emotional rollercoaster. Looking forward to the future at the moment, but feeling fearful of the drop I see in front of me.